open letters to famous people

i realize that you two were oh-so-adorable back in the day, but i have to tell you, i get confused.

run it down for me: which is which again?


i know one of you is super-duper skinny, and one of you dresses like a bag lady. and one of you is a blonde now. and crazy. right?

or is that all the same one?

maybe you're both crazy? but only one is blonde. i know that or sure. oh dammit, it's so hard to remember!

which is the crazy bag-lady wannabe and which is the...other one?

thanks.